old resolutions & a new mindset

be-you-bravely


Happy New Year! I hope your Eve was spent exactly how you wanted it, whether that means counting down the seconds with sparkler in hand with a crowd of people, or from your couch with a glass of something bubbly. I spent it playing games with my parents and Dago, eating the best little hors d'oeuvres that my dad made!

For whatever reason, I've sort of been dreading writing this post. I knew I didn't accomplish my resolutions for 2014 because I could only remember 2/3 of them. Looking back at last year's resolutions, I had myself a big LOL. Become a crafting queen? I did an okay job at this between February and March with my hoop art, but I certainly wouldn't say I became crafty in general. Write a memoir? HA. Instead I learned that this just isn't a goal I'm ready to go for. Save more money? This is the resolution I didn't even remember setting, so, no, I didn't save money. At all. Girl's got more bills than she can keep up with.

While I forgot about my own resolutions for 2014, it was actually someone else's that stuck in my mind all year. Last year, Linda of Little Tin Soldier wrote the best New Year's post I've ever seen, where she described the difference between resolutions and realizations, and came to the decision to realize herself as a plucky and creative woman in 2014. Her words were so powerful and significant, and I thought about them often as I traveled through 2014. What an effective way to think about a new year and the kind of person you want to be in that time.

For me, the alternative to resolutions this year is a mindset. I want to give myself a mindset to use as a lens as I move through 2015, setting and achieving goals, working and blogging, loving others and myself.

In 2015, I want to be me, bravely. I want to love the body I live in, which is an act of bravery every single day. I want to blog without comparing myself to others, and put my best work out there to my readers without getting caught up in what other bloggers are doing. I've learned that it takes guts to stand apart. I want to go above and beyond at work, which can be scary because it's unprecedented in nature. I have good ideas and I'm going to make sure they're heard and carefully put them into action.

In 2015, I want to become a better me; the me I'm meant to be without hesitation or doubt. As Ariana Grande sings, "Now I can become who I really are."

Are you setting resolutions this year? Is there a mindset you want to take on 2015?

Sidenote: I almost deleted this post twice because I found other New Year's resolution/reflection type posts that I loved. Ultimately, I'm sticking with what I came up with (ahem no comparisons!), but I wanted to share them anyway. Nicolette Mason borrowed a really awesome format for her resolutions, and I also identified with so much of her end-of-year recap regarding the many tragedies the world faced in 2014. I also wanted to share this list of 50 reflection questions that I found through Jessica of Here & Now. I've spent a lot of time over the last few days carefully considering each one, which was really cathartic.

11 comments

  1. This is a wonderful way to approach life changes. I feel like when I make resolutions, that's really what I'm getting at--that I want to be a person who is better with money, that I want to be someone who is healthy and happy, etc., but I make these little "tasks" for myself that I think mark my progress toward this identity. I don't think that the steps we take are always the steps we lay out for ourselves, so maybe it's smarter, and ultimately more self-serving, to get to the root of what we're really wanting when we tell ourselves (and others) that we want to be different. Never laugh at big dreams. Continue making them, knowing that you will fall short so many times. That's how we move onward and upward.


    Jen
    yourstrulyjen.com

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  2. This is great. Resolutions feel so tired, don't they? I did, kinda make some, regarding certain tangible things I can do; but the deeper ideas in my life, wellness, relationships, spirituality, I DO just want to change my mindset (couldn't figure out how to really explain that, thanks!) I think that is actually attainable, as opposed to making a goal that you can't keep. I'm glad you didn't delete this, thanks for sharing!

    ♥ perfectly Priya

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  3. I'm glad you didn't delete this before posting!


    Last year, I set a list of goals I wanted to accomplish for 2014. I found that I fixated on a couple of them and did a really good job... but the others? Epic failure.


    I'm still going to go through my year planning workbook that I started doing a couple years ago. I'm a little behind on it this year, but I want to keep this in mind while doing it.

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  4. i'm glad too, haha! i feel like there are so many different good ways to focus on positive goals and change throughout the year. i've been doing a great job with my 25 before 25 list and i do well with my small goals, so it just made sense for me to set a sort of lens to do my other goals through, since i set so many already.


    the year planning workbook sounds awesome!


    OH! btw i went and took a bubble bath the other night after reading your recipe and, while i didn't have a chance to pick up the Trader Joe's salt, it was so enjoyable. thanks for the inspiration!

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  5. i think i'm being cynical this year, but it just feels like resolutions are set with good intentions and no real support to make them happen. it's cold out, we've all just had a vacation and been around family and friends, and we're still living on the high (or low) of the last year. that's why i'm so glad i get to set my 25 before 25 goals in May when it's warm and i have my footing in the year.


    i have a friend who blogs on and off who sets monthly small goals like mine but does one for each area of her life (intellect, spirituality, relationships, etc). i think it's a really cool way to be super mindful and deliberate throughout the month. here's one of her recent (from June) goal posts: http://losdevores.blogspot.com/2014/06/june-goals.html

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  6. love this comment. i feel like you always tie up my posts in a perfect little bow in the comments section and get at what i'm really trying to say.


    can't wait to see where this year takes us!

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  7. lists are my favorite too, so it was actually kind of hard giving that up. i do my monthly small goals though, so that will give me 12 opportunities to make lists i can actually keep up with!


    thanks so much for your sweet words about my blog. it's tough when you feel like you're putting out good stuff and other people have more readers, etc, but i love and relate to my readers individually and i think a lot of blogs lose that when their numbers start to grow.


    can't wait to see what the new year holds for us (and little Asa)! ps. i love your new layout -- it feels like it really grew up with you this year!

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  8. This is a great post! I love the idea of realizations and I think that many of mine are very similar to yours. It really is all about growing as a person and leading a happier life.
    xo
    styleontheside.com

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  9. You are such a remarkable woman, Nicole...one who inspires me daily and makes me want to be better: a better blogger, a better woman, a better friend, a better advocate, a better me. I loved this post. You are such a brave woman, and I love your realization for the year. It is SO hard to be authentically us and live bravely in the world (particularly as women), and I find your mantra for the year so admirable. I think of your blog constantly when I think about what direction I'd like my blog to take. In my daily life, I am a strong, independent feminist/woman, but I rarely address this on my blog. I want to take a note from you and be more vulnerable on my blog and write about some more "real" topics. I need to be more brave and bold as well. Thank you for helping me figure out who I am even more :) XOXO

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  10. your comments, dear Brynn, always fill me with so much emotion -- always good. YOU are so brave, and i so admire the way you write about the woman you've become and the one you keep working to be. you do such amazing work in your career (omg and finishing school while working and blogging? that was huge!). i think it's going to make so much sense on your blog to write from that place of being a feminist -- the way you approach your closet, your money, your relationship (which by the way, i think our S.O.s would get along swimmingly!), your future are all through a feminist lens already. i can't wait to see what you write about and what you accomplish in 2015!

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  11. YES!! I absolutely love love love this post! I want to be be bravely and become a better me! Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't be the nerdy awkward girl that I am, but I am who I am and I'm proud of that! I want to be better and that means going back to the gym! I love my body, but I want to love it even more!
    ~Sara

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